Category: Life

Venus Retrograde October 8th 2010; By the Light of an old Flame.

Erika Ginnis

"The Birth of Venus" by Botticelli 1485Here is yet another in my series of posts about astrology; and while this isn’t just an astrological blog, there have been so many interesting and powerful transits recently, I am just compelled to write about them; especially when people keep asking “what the heck is up??”.

So there are a few more things happening in the skies that are effecting us; Venus, Mars and then eventually Mercury once again. This will bring us to the end of the year.

I am not sure if I will talk much about the next Mercury retrograde period in this post since it’s a ways off, but just know that not too long after Venus goes back direct, Mercury will be set to go into retrograde in December so it’s been a “whole lotta retrogrades going on” this last few months.

So back to what I intended to write about!! Venus…

Venus is going…well I should say gone (by the time you read this) retrograde.

A little about retrograde.

All the planets show apparent retrograde motion at one time or another. I say apparent because they really don’t physically go backwards, it’s about how it looks to us.

They orbit the Sun as we do, and so when we observe them in the skies and chart their patterns during a year or two, we will see that they look like they are going forward for a time and then backwards for a time. Retrograde is when they move backwards from the point of view of the Earth (where we view them); therefore they go backwards through the astrological signs since we use the earth as the focal point of astrology. These movements are significant and have effects that can be felt and observed in our lives.

You might ask why in the world this would have any effect at all, since it is all an illusion. Good question! However there are as many answers to that  question as  there are people to answer it  🙂

My take on it is that “this” (meaning all of this loveliness we call the physical plane) is all actually an illusion in one manner or another (that screen you are viewing is really a whole lot of  points of light given instructions by a bunch of zeros and ones; and that chair you are sitting in is actually a bunch of  atoms and molecules made up of primarily empty space; at the outer edge of which are electron clouds whose position can only truly be called a “probability”) so I figure it’s all good and we can find usable truth in a lot of places. I personally find a lot in astrology, it’s a great language to talk about our collective consciousness and our larger energetic nature; it gives some good sign posts to watch pointing to tendencies and movement of energy so I am very happy working with it.

Ok back to planets…

Each planet has different aspects and qualities associated with them. Mercury retrograde gets a lot of air play because we are such a communications based society and so when Mercury (which is associated with communication among other things) goes into retrograde we can really feel it; plus it goes retrograde several times a year since it moves so fast in general (the winged messenger doncha know!).  Venus however moves much more slowly than our winged friend and so she only goes retrograde every 18 months or so, but when Venus is retrograde it lasts longer (about 6 weeks).

The planet Venus (Goddess of Love) is all about Love, romance, marriage and partnerships, aesthetics, beauty and fashion, money and wealth, feelings, emotions and relationships, female energy and interaction,  desire,  social attitudes and behavior. Venus symbolizes female relationships and social interactions in general. Where she is in our charts or in the heavens also influences our values, capacity for humor, and the pursuit of pleasure….plus hearts and flowers 🙂 (that last part I just threw in but I stand by it).

When Venus goes retrograde is can feel like everything has gone a little dull, people can feel they are less beautiful; it can be like looking out of a window that needs to be cleaned, everything looks a little grayer than normal.

People tend to get a bit more serious, and wonder where all the “fun” went. Well silly it’s cuz Venus our supreme party girl has left the building!! She isn’t really gone, she is just gone to take a powder for a few weeks, she is relaxing at a spa somewhere and so we are on our own more than normal to really cultivate our inner beauty and remember that our worth isn’t about external things at all… it’s, as they say, an inside job.

Venus retrograde changes our perception of what is valuable or what we desire. This is why people often suggest that it is NOT the time to redo your hair into a new style or color, or redecorate your house. The reason being that things that appear to us as “can’t live without” during this transit, will quickly move into the “re-gifting” pile once Venus is direct again (hmmm just in time for the holidays 🙂 ). It’s fine of course, to continue with things you started before this all came down; meaning you don’t have to wait if you have already picked out your new furniture, it’s just making the new decisions will be better served later.

It can be a great time to go antique buying or garage sale-ing AS LONG as you know the value. You can get great deals, since things may not appear as valuable during the transit, and so they don’t get scooped up. This is not the best time to look for property, unless again you really know the value. You might however get that loan you have been wanting if it’s been hard to do previously, since it’s all about perception; this transit shifts how things look, and how we perceive them.

Venus retrograde can be troublesome in some cases with relationships, and things tend to just go slower so try not to take stuff as personally if you can help it. Often we are forced to deal with deep feelings that have their origins in past events. However it can help resolve relationship issues that have been plaguing you in the past, it’s sometimes easier (with everyone so down to earth) to have those conversations that have been needed and perhaps even reconcile or resolve a troubled relationship, since folks aren’t nearly as distracted by pretty shiny things. This is the time to go back and take care of unfinished business; emotional, financial, relational.

Venus retrograde is notorious for people popping out of the woodwork that you haven’t seen or thought of in a long time. Past friends, and especially past loves figure high on the guest list of things revisited. I know last Venus retrograde I have 5 different people find me from 30 years ago and reconnect. Don’t be surprised if you have a lot of “blasts from the past” show up as friend requests on one or another social networking site!

It isn’t a great time to go get big ticket luxury items, and in fact many of us may feel the sense of not being able to afford those things, since Venus effects the feeling of desire and affluence. I have to remind myself that this is a transit, meaning it is temporary!

Venus will be going retrograde this time in Scorpio, which is a heads up for folks with strong Scorpio in their charts. It will be a time for deep inner reflection for all of us, since Scorpio is so much about depth, and this inner reflection will occur especially around the topics that are ruled by Venus. It is also advised for us to be mindful about potential feelings of jealousy since they might come up until Venus backs up into Libra around November 8th.

One other thing, is that Mars (planet symbolizing the masculine energy, Yang, warrior energy, sex, power) is in Scoprio and oh so close to being conjunct with Venus…ahhhh but no, not quite!! Just before the consummation of this conjunction Venus turns around and says ahhh nope, and goes retrograde. So it’s conjunction interruptus (bad I know couldn’t help it LOL), or maybe more like Tantra!  So this will draw out that energy for quite a while (spring I think) so Mars is adding a lot of power to this particular Venus Retrograde, plus there are a whole lot of amazing overtones due to the placement of these two planets.

I found an excellent article on that specifically and will include the link here. I really like what this astrologer had to say.

http://sasstrology.com/2010/10/the-venus-mars-conjunction-in-scorpio-and-gender-experimentation.html

For those of you who want the specifics of time and date here is the actual retrograde information.

Friday, October 8, 2010, Venus reaches her retrograde station at 13° Scorpio 14′, in preparation for a period of retrograde motion that will last until November 18, 2010, when she reaches her direct station at 27° Libra 40′.

Knowing about the astrological weather is as useful as knowing about any kind of environmental factor. It doesn’t have to determine your experience, but it can absolutely inform your experience. Now that we know that we are out in the field and see the big system moving in (can you tell I live on an island?) we can either get into the house in time to stay dry, grab a book and enjoy the show or we can set out our blanket and grab a thermos; let it rain stars and flowers on us, let the water soak us, run down our hair, fill our mouths and wash us clean. It’s still all about choice.

Blessings and aloha

Erika

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Jupiter conjunct Uranus in Pisces Sept. 18th 2010; Lightworkers start your engines.

Erika Ginnis
Photo credit NASA

I wasn’t planning on writing a blog post tonight. I should actually be sleeping, but I am not remotely tired (that may change by tomorrow morning!). I decided to check into the astrology for my own transits since I have been feeling a lot of interesting energy in general today (kind of erratic; sometimes great sometimes not at all great) and I thought hmmmm I better see what’s up.

Low and behold at this moment, even as I write this post, Jupiter and Uranus are at 28 degrees Pisces (per HST) right on TOP of my Mercury; and opposite the Sun in Virgo.

I knew this conjunction was happening again (last spring the conjunction was in Aries…June 8th remember that anyone?) and I knew it was coming up soon; but I lost track given a lot of shifts in my personal life in relation to someone who (drum roll please) has Sun in Virgo 29 degrees (yes that means an impending birthday).  So my life is playing out that opposition once again, this time with the amazing planets of Jupiter and Uranus conjunct my natal Mercury (this was why I was hesitant to write anything tonight LOL, who knows where I will end up).  I have been planning on writing on the upcoming Venus retrograde coming up in a couple weeks; and I will do that but it will be a later post…sometime next week most likely. I had in all honesty not been paying attention to this latest transit in a year of OMG transits (the technical term again), well it would be more accurate to say that in the living of it I had not been studying it.

So what does this all mean? Well lets look at who is coming to the party…

Jupiter weighs in quite large and expansive, higher education, travel, abundant life; traditionally known as the “great benefic” in old astrology. It is the planet whose transits signifiy the individual reaching out to include more and more of the ALL, the Universe, the energy of the cosmos. It is also about largeness, making something big and grand. When applied to consciousness it is literally about expanding and raising consciousness. Interestingly it also relates to law and legal systems and government officials ( I say interesting because here in Hawaii we are having our state primary today, which should be interesting under this transit).

Next we have Uranus which is electric and eccentric unusual and unpredictable, lots of sudden shifts and changes occur when Uranus is strongly aspected. Uranus wants change and it wants it now thank you very much. This is great if you are up with the change but very unsettling if you were hoping for (holding on to) the structure which is up for renovation. Uranus loves the individual and freedom. It’s not at all about the status quo (unless it is in the process of over-throwing it).  It is the “expect the unexpected” kind of transit with Uranus at the helm.

So just with these two to start with we have a transit of interesting and unexpected occurrences and opportunities. There is a striving for personal freedom in ways that have not been expressed before, there is the feeling of “lets run away and join the circus” since these two planets together inspire radical quick change, not so much about sticking to responsibilities. Balance can be helpful in all this, so that people who were counting on you aren’t left in the dust wondering what hit them. Travel can figure in all of this, or sudden inspired opportunity. Now this is just in general we haven’t even gotten to where this is falling or who is across the line from it all.

The plot thickens.

So this lovely conjunction is happening in (trumpet sounds inserted here) Pisces

(the trumpets were really for me since I am Pisces Sun and Mercury…but I digress…hmm maybe that’s two ways of saying the same thing :))

In a transit the sign that it occurs in will be the one to set the energy. So this party is being brought to you by Pisces..sign of the mystic, energy, soul, oneness; also occult and vagueness, and over indulgence and escapism via various substances (ah yes there is always that). So basically this party is sounding a little like a rave. I am kind of making a joke here, but as I type this I know there is a great deal of truth to that; perhaps a rave heavy on the Trance inducing music.

Last but not least we have the last energy to join the mix, albeit more transitory. This being the Sun in Virgo in opposition. Virgo loves structure and specifics and form and control; details and service, logical progression. So this helps with bringing the energy of this Piscean transit into the physical plane. So this expansion is not just about the stuff of dreams only, it is about real life and bringing those dreams into fruition and practical application. There is also even more potential for sudden changes in ones environment, especially any that prompt the expression of personal freedom and expression; self expression is key in this transit, and with the placing of the Virgo-Piscean axis it is the balance of Spirit and Mind; Oneness and individualization of that Oneness into creative manifestation.

This conjunction is very potent. Many amazing things are available within this energy. The shifts may be sudden and electrifying, but the resulting experiences can open our eyes to new possibilities on the consciousness front; Light workers start your engines! We are talking about energies coming together to foster, literally and figuratively, a richer broader perspective; new aspects of life, radical solutions to problems that you might not have considered otherwise but Jupiter gives the courage to go for it (oh for the presentation of new forms of energy on our planet… I love the potential here). Encountering life in a larger more expansive way (Jupiter), and feeling/knowing the oneness that we all share (Pisces), and doing it in a radical/unusual sudden transformative way (Uranus), and bringing it into your real world (Virgo/Sun).

Lots of changes on all fronts. These transits will effect everyone in different ways of course, depending on their own personal chart in addition to the global experience of the planetary energies. In my case it is showing up as a totally unexpected blog post in the middle of the night which, as I read what I have written,  is making a lot of my own life make way more sense.

Go out and let yourself be who you are, expand, express, tap into the mystery and let it surprise you; even if it’s feeling sudden and unexpected look for the ghost in the machine and “Party on Garth”.

Aloha and blessings,
Erika

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Perspective and some Good news ~ Erika Ginnis

Erika Ginnis


Some Good news!!

You know I generally use this blog to express my ideas and maybe some techniques, and I don’t use it as much just to share. However I was messing around on my iPhone tonight and I was totally touched by two different things, one an article and one a video. So of course I had to create a post.  🙂

I know these are all around Facebook and such, and so you may have seen them and that’s all good. But for me they both (for different reasons) really opened my heart and brought tears to my eyes; plus I am all GO Australia…since they are both from Australia.

Here are two examples of teachers to us all, that I want to share; they show up in this way one on purpose, one not, but both due to sheer force of Love.

This first one is a link to an article that talks about a mother who by love and contact and energy (and in my opinion talking to the actual being who is her son) brought him into this life alive; even after the doctors told her he was born dead. This is an incredible thing on so many levels. And it points to me the idea of miracles being “awesome normalities”;  as one of my former teachers would say. It also points out the importance of touch and our organic connection with each other and how profound that truly is…

Here’s the link, complete with pics then and now…

Miracle mum brings premature baby son back to life with two hours of loving cuddles after doctors pronounce him dead

We are living in the age of miracles and how often do we miss them because we are pointed in the opposite direction. I am sharing this because here is someone who, in the face of the worse information a mother would ever want to hear, still moves forward. Rather than crumbling into despair as would be her right; she turns her attention EVEN IN THE FACE OF DEATH, to what she does want. Talks to her son as if he is alive; tells him his name; tells him about his sister…holds him and loves him.

This is pure grace and total Source shinning love. And see what happens!! How much can we use this energy; this complete disregard of the frightening “facts” before us; not fighting them, but simply loving anyway! How can we bring this same principle into our own lives even when the circumstances are not so dire?

This second one is a video, and actually I guess it is a promotional video for a DVD or CD from this person; and while I am not sharing this to promote him specifically, I thought that the message that he shared during this 2 minute or so video was priceless.

I sat there and just cried while watching it…not because I was sad; but because I was so inspired and impressed and happy to see this teacher and what he was teaching his students. The light that he shines is palatable.

Source/God/The Universe shows up in so many ways; in, as, and through all of us; and to see someone who I would normally have preconceived notions about based on his physicality, shine so brightly as himself, as God; this is a gift. This man in this video is so thoroughly in his spiritual center that it shouts out with every fiber of his being.

These are examples (in my opinion) of Conscious Metamorphosis. And I share them here so we can remember that we can each do this; we don’t have to wait for a crisis, or a lifetime with specific things to overcome in order to do it.

Bless bless bless those who have come to us through these kinds of things; and let’s use their example as ways to keep perspective and grace though all of the things life brings to us and around us.

httpvh://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gc4HGQHgeFE

Hope you enjoy them, I thought they were very cool!

Blessings and Aloha ~Erika

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“Don’t stop believing; and Bless everything no exceptions” Glee and my spiritual practice. ~ Erika Ginnis

Erika Ginnis

“Don’t stop believing; and Bless everything no exceptions”

I am going to touch on three things in this post; the first one has to do with the TV show Glee. For those of you who aren’t familiar with it (and you don’t need to be for purposes this post, although it will be even more enjoyable for those that are 🙂 ) Glee is a new, very popular, show that revolves around the experiences of a High School Glee club; but it’s really about much much more.

Ok so yes here I am talking about a TV series, and one might say how can this really be spiritual. But I have to say that there are things in this show that touch my heart so deeply; one of which is a song that has become a kind of theme through the show thus far, the chorus of which goes …”Don’t stop believing, hold on to that feeling”. Sound familiar? If not feel free to scroll down to watch the YouTube video I included, and then come back up and start reading again here…

This song shows up in such poignant ways all through the season of Glee, and it speaks to many of us across a wide range of experiences. I invite you to think about what this phrase is saying.

Don’t stop believing.

Believe even in the midst of doubt; believe even though there is no visible evidence. This is the call of spirit, of our deep inner selves. It is the guiding light that shines on the path that we are walking, that shows us the turns to take.

Hold on to that feeling; yes that is the key because from that feeling springs the emotion and from that emotion springs the vibration and from that vibration springs the demonstration of your belief.

I love Glee, I love that we have these amazing individuals falling and returning to center, showing us our own path. Reminding us of times gone by or times to come; but also of what is right in front of us right now.

Every moment is an opportunity to believe, and it’s put to the test during the times when we feel lost or alone on our journey (how perfect that the song is originally by Journey, such a metaphor!). We lose who we are (we think); we think our dreams are lost too, but this is never true! Our dreams are right there waiting for us to turn back toward them and embrace them.

The next related point is something I have been thinking and writing about lately; as is shown in the season finale of Glee, the concept that you do not have to be the best to be really good, or worthwhile.

During the season Finale they (and I am assuming here that people have seen the show and I am not spoiling it for anyone) do not win the contest they are in, there are many reasons for that but they don’t in fact win. This is surprising especially for a TV show where these kids are the underdogs, I personally wanted them to win, expected them to win! However they don’t and they “didn’t even place” (as one character says) And yet, and yet… they are amazing and they are the epitome of heart and love (IMHO) and growth and evolution of self.

What I wrote previously on this idea of not having to be the BEST…

One thing that I have been struck with on this topic that I have been meditating on since it really hit home; was the idea that you do not have to be the BEST at something (ie perfect) to be good at it; or for it to be worthwhile. I started to wonder how many people are not doing/sharing their gifts and light and ideas because they judge it as “not-as-good-as” and so don’t do it at all?

If I take that to the extreme it means there can only be one who is the “good one” at anything; and even if you are the ONE that is the BEST, there is so much energy going into keeping that place because that itself is so transitory! Plus it’s totally subjective! I am not saying to stop striving to be the best you can be at something, but there is a difference between having that as something you are inspired to do; and letting it stop you from doing all kinds of different things or new things.

This becomes more important as we move into new avenues of expression that may be entirely new for everyone since we are all evolving in so many ways.

All is one, even though we are all a variety of expressions of that One. Each time you let yourself move forward become larger greater, move into new territory, it’s like one of the flowers on the HUGE tree of US opens and blooms; each time a flower bursts open it stimulates more flowers to bloom.

This whole show is about being your self no matter what someone else’s opinion is, it is about following that dream, believing in yourself. I think that is one of the reasons that the show is so powerful; there is such a strong message in it.

This same song in the finale; which echoes both the first episode, and another later episode; epitomizes the longing for a child hood dream (in this case music) and an individual deciding to follow it rather than desert it, which makes it all the more heart opening.

How do we then keep these dreams alive in us? There are many many ways, but one that I am going to mention is something that many people have suggested over the years; and that I had a very personal experience with it recently…

Last weekend I had to get up really early for a commitment on Saturday. I was having a hard time sleeping the night before; I couldn’t fall asleep in my bed so I was out on the couch. I was having one of those nights where I was increasingly aware of what time it was in relation to what time I had to get up. I had been sort of dozing but was awake again and feeling kind of stiff.  It was about 3 in the morning. I got up kind of sore from the position I had been in and was going to try the bed again. I put my arms up and stretched and was right in the middle of this huge sigh.

I was planning on it ending in a frustrated exclamation, I even kind of resigned to how I would feel after that…but oddly enough that wasn’t what happened.

It’s like I had been up in the air, ready to come down in a specific pre-chosen spot and something just shifted positions in me; and rather than landing where I thought I would, I came down somwhere entirely different and utterly unplanned.  What changed? Well in mid-sigh surprisingly I heard something within myself tell me this thought, rather than the one I had planned…

“bless everything; no exceptions”

And all of a sudden that “pre-groan” sigh, turned into a sigh of relief. It was like all at once I was a different person than I had been two seconds before. I smiled instead of groaning as I had been literally planning to do moments before, and I went to bed and slept well. It had truly been a moment of unexpected grace.

I want to note this because it was a good and powerful place to be in and return to. Since that time, all week (of course) I have been getting that message every time I turn around; in books; in spiritual practice on my iPhone; in emails 🙂 and so I know it is absolutely important to me on my path right now. This all on its own was lovely and inspiring but there is more to the story.

That Saturday I went through my day and came home and had time to read a good book and relax. I was in a pretty uplifted place and so that night I slept well with no need to watch the clock. I was still integrating this idea of “bless everything no exceptions”; which was not the most natural of spiritual practices I have encountered, given some of my own mental habits.

However what happened on Sunday was like a time release experience.

Sunday morning I woke up well rested (up early again for the second day of my budgeting commitment) and had this feeling of blessing running entirely through me. I got up and thought about various things and when I found myself slipping (by habit) into complaining in my mind or attitude; the phrase would resurface, and I would start just blessing whatever it was, no matter what I thought of it. This changed my entire morning.

Given the early start of my day I found myself driving into Hilo before many people were up (since it was a Sunday). I spent the whole drive in, blessing everything; it was like I had a long wide cloak/wave coming out from my shoulders and fanning out behind me. I was at the leading edge of the cloak/wave and I imagined just blessing everyone as they were sleeping. I was loving all these people who hadn’t started their day yet; who were still in bed or just getting up. I imagined their mornings and breakfasts and afternoon get-togethers and I blessed and blessed and blessed. It was effortless and felt so very good. I kept that feeling all through the day; every time I would feel that I was falling into worry or anything else I would move right back into blessing. It changed my entire experience.

I didn’t try to change the things I saw even if they weren’t the way I wanted them to be,  I just “blessed everything, no exceptions”; if I saw a place in my life with a hole instead of the something I wanted in it, I blessed it.  If I noticed anything at all, any person place or thing no matter what they were doing, I blessed them, I covered them with this cloak of blessing. It was so cool.

I share this story because I think we can use this for our own dreams and visions; every time we might get tempted to judge ourselves harshly (which can be so so so easy to do, at least for me sometimes) we can instead choose to “Bless everything; no exceptions”. This will entirely change our energy and therefore our experience.

We can take the example from the kids in Glee… Don’t stop believing hold on to that feeling! and Bless everything no exceptions, and see what kind of beauty we can create.

Blessings and Aloha,

Erika Ginnis

(ps this video is from mid season, not the finale, but it was a nice version of the song so I am including it here. There are as you might guess, a bagillion Youtube videos of this song in its various forms from Glee… so take your pick and enjoy!)
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httpvh://www.youtube.com/watch?v=umF1M7wGiCc

Truth in advertising; unedited evolution ~ Erika Ginnis

Erika Ginnis

Faith and Trust

Something I did the other day, maybe two days ago. Was to take my iPhone (which I use way more than I ever thought I would) and start a new note. Not a big deal right? Well maybe, but it was really helpful to me at least the evening I did it because I started a list of things that have gone well for me.

Let me back up a bit and let you know why I was doing that in the first place…Sometimes I am not sure what to share on my blog. I have three all together (but of course, if one is good m-u-s-t add MORE) and this one is really dedicated to the process of evolution that I believe we are all hip deep in, on this lovely blue planet here at the beginning of the 21st Century.

I started this blog because I had ideas and visions and experiences that I thought might be of use to other people out there who may be having something similar happening to them in the midst of all this change. Being a metaphysical teacher and counselor, it kind of made sense to me. I am still very much in line with that intention. The thing is, I find that I sometimes edit my own experience because I want to be a place of inspiration rather than adding to the angst.

This is good in theory, but more difficult in practice, because I find I can be in such an “editing” mode that I don’t write as often as I might, or share all that I might. The thing is, there are most likely not that many people reading this anyway, so why all the self-critique? Part of it is just old habits, part of it is training, part is wanting to show up differently in various aspects of my life. What is occurring to me however, is that I often get so much value out of the experience of others as I hear their stories; what makes me think that only the “cream” of my experience will be of use to someone else? This is a process of shifting and change we are all involved in and sometimes it isn’t all neat and tidy.

If all I show is the neat and tidy aspects of what is going on, what kind of message does that give? And once again I have to ask who am I really writing for? If I am writing for my self and my own evolution then I need to be willing to process all that I am really processing, not just what I judge as being helpful to someone else; if I am writing for other people (and that gets sticky all on its own) then what makes me think that they are not going to relate to what ever it is that is up for me in my life at that moment? Law of attraction being what it is, wouldn’t it follow that whoever finds me on a given day will be drawn there simply by the vibrations of the thoughts and words that I am pondering, and wouldn’t that mean it is perfect all along?

Thoughts are like stars, they have their own gravity and collect their own solar system around them.

I am the creator of these thoughts, or perhaps I am the medium through which they come into this reality. Regardless I want to be in a place to respect that creative process and also revel in it; let my thoughts and ideas and observations come up from inside of me and spread out in all directions gathering what they will. I want to trust that whoever is reading, is here for some good of their own, and whatever I am sharing is going add to it in some fashion.

So back to the other evening…I am juggling a lot of emotional things these days. I have lost a parent recently; and by lost meaning their energy is still around but their body is not. I have another parent who is living in a “memory care” unit of a lovely facility, but which costs a fair bit to maintain. I have someone who I am technically married to who no longer lives with me and I am completely unsure about which direction that relationship should or will go; and while I attract a lot of dollars, I have also created a series of situations where what was promised did not actually arrive.

I understand this is my creation; it doesn’t always help to know that (especially if I use it to beat myself up) and it isn’t the bit of information that will help change it. How often do we rack our brains trying to find the place that originated the issue in the first place? What was I thinking, why did I attract that? Why am I still dealing with “..fill in the blank..”?

We are all in the process of sifting through the stuff that needs to change; it is happening on a personal level; a governmental level; an environmental level; and a consciousness level. These shifts can be enormous or tiny; we are all part of this larger moving energy and the whole thing is evolving is leaps and bounds. I am sure you have noticed!

This is a lot to chew on, and I sometimes let it all go, and dive into the deep of me. Then there are times where the things of the day require my attention; I must attend to the various details which are mine to do. I find myself scared, or hurt, or angry. I find myself tempted to stay in those places longer than it is prudent for my own peace of mind.

I generally don’t stay there too long, it’s just much to uncomfortable; but I would be lying if I said I was never there, because I am, and I do feel those things.

I have been working with some of that this last week, after one of my bills (the one for my Mom) went up, while one particular income stream went way down (eek). This brought up fear, and anger and hurt all at the same time. In the midst of all of this I found myself thinking about the many many times (in the past) that amazing answers, and ideas, and opportunities, and even cash, came my way to solve my “dilema du jour”.

So I thought maybe I should write some of that down, remind myself about it, see if I am just making that up or if it really has happened that way. I starting with the note screen on my phone and now it is so long it takes at least 10 scrolls (with my finger) to get to the end; even writing this I have added two more.

I am writing about this because it is what is going on with me. The list I made helped remind me of all the “out of the blue” things that have happened over and over again. This is important because those are the “solar systems” I want to populate.

I now find that I could probably use re-reading this list more than once. I am not sure how this next phase will right itself. However I have this blog, and since this is definitely “spiritual evolution on a personal level” this topic is totally applicable. And I will keep you (whoever you are) and me posted.

Aloha and Blessings,

Erika

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